Welcome baby Kennedy

A Birth Story for Kennedy Summer Skinner

I was due to deliver you on Wednesday, June 20th. We spent the weeks before your due date walking over 2 miles a day. We (meaning me lugging you), would walk Jefferson to school every morning, and pick him up every afternoon. I thought for sure this would help put me into labor early.
Nope
At my last Dr. appointment the doctor pulled out a calendar. She was very blunt in laying out the facts. “Kristina,” she said, “you have a lot going on in the next couple weeks. You really can’t afford to continue further than your due date. You need time to recover, and the baby to recover from delivery.” This was true, but I didn’t want to face it. She scheduled me for an induction 2 days later, and I cried my way home. Being induced was the last thing I wanted… (well, after a c-section, and epidural, but more on that later). The consolation would be that my dr. was on call, and would be delivering you. 
It seems a lot people love having their births scheduled. I hated it! Tuesday was a very difficult day for me. It was like reality was about to hit me with a ton of bricks… and I was watching it come closer. I have known I would be doing this without your Daddy by my side for months…. but now it was real, and frightening. A neighbor of mine was willing to come over and give me a blessing just hours before I went to the hospital. I am so thankful for the Priesthood, and I believe this blessing is what got me through the next day. (I know, I’m making this sound like I was about to walk ‘the Green Mile’)
Wednesday morning at 12:10 am I arrived at the hospital. They checked me in and began the Pitocin at about 1:30 am. Because of the risks involved in your pregnancy, the doctor had me hooked up to the monitor (meaning no walking around, no jacuzzi tub…. bed-bound). And because of my previous cesarean, the dr. gave me a lower dose of Pitocin (meaning labor could take longer… and it did). I progressed slowly.
I entered the hospital dilated to a 3
9 hrs. later, at 9 am I was dilated to a 4
5 hrs. later, at 2pm I was dilated to a 5
at this point I had the dr. break my water, and things progressed more quickly
3 hrs. later, at 5pm I was dilated to a 9
by now I had been laboring for about 15 hours, in a single bed, in a room,  alone. It was difficult. But at the same time, I felt a complete sense of peace. I was physically the only one in the room, but I think there was some spiritual guidance. I believe the room was visited by many spirits who were comforting me as I brought you into this world. The peace and calm that I felt can’t be described.
I had wanted to deliver you naturally so badly. But by the time I reached 9 cm, I was drained and couldn’t bear anymore. I felt disappointed in myself and had a mini-breakdown. Luckily, I had one of the kindest nurses I’ve ever had. She comforted me, and reasoned with me….. I ended up getting an epidural. It was hard for me to be okay with it for a while. But in the whole scheme of life, does it really matter? um, no.
What matters was that I delivered a very healthy baby girl…. you.
There are only a few events that bring you so close to the veil that you feel like you can almost reach out and touch Heaven. Giving birth is definitely one of them. The moment your head crowned, I was overwhelmed with emotion. This was real. Your dad and I have been waiting for you for over 2 years… and I would have you in my arms in a few moments. The doctor held you up and announced “you have a beautiful baby girl.” Nothing has ever brought me more joy. You were truly beautiful. You cried the loudest cry, but calmed almost immediately after they placed you in my arms…. you knew you were home. And through all the hours I labored with you, you struggled also… we had gone through this together and bonded inseparably. 
I silently thanked Heavenly Father for entrusting me with one of his most precious daughters.
Your Daddy’s absence was my challenge, not yours. He bonded with you immediately even though he wasn’t in the delivery room. He was able to text with me throughout the day and he heard your cries in the evening. His love for you was instant and could never be diminished by distance!
          
You were born on your due date, Wednesday, June 20th 2012 at 6:57pm. You were greeted by your Mom and Nana.You were 9lbs. 1 oz. and 20 inches long. You had brown hair that shined like silver, and dark blue eyes. No birthmarks. You had a dimple in your chin, just like Jefferson. Your Dad will be happy to know your have ear lobes (unlike your mom).  Your cheeks were chubby. And you were perfect!

June 20th was the first day of Summer, so we chose to name you after that season. Summer is my favorite season (especially in Oregon). I look forward to its arrival each year because it brings warmth, fun, and brightens my mood. It seems fitting to name you after summer. There had been someone missing from our home, and we have been anticipating your arrival for so long. The day you were born I felt such warmth…. almost a bubbly feeling. I can’t describe it any differently than,

I LOVE YOU
Mommy
p.s. and you think you’re getting smothered with loves by me….. that’s nothin’….. wait until you meet your daddy!

 

Our once little family. Jefferson is happy. The reason he isn’t smiling is because he doesn’t like his teeth, he said.

The boys meeting their sister for the first time. They adore her.
     

but Reagan, she was ecstatic to find out she had a little sister! And She has not left her side since she was born… literally. Just look at that smile. I don’t think Reagan has ever been happier. 

Meeting your Nana

Oh, look at that sour face.

Kennedy and I, all dressed and ready to head home.

This last week has been a whirlwind… actually, I’m still in it. I feel sortof like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. The whole world has been spinning, but this little darling has kept me calm and at peace. It seems odd… usually it’s the baby who creates more chaos. But I feel like Kennedy has been the shinning light in all of this. Of course her birth came while Shawn was gone, I was packed and left without my belongings, and we’re moving across the continent… but her timing couldn’t have been any more perfect! I feel so blessed to hold her every day. I don’t think I could do this without her.
 

 

A Birthday Boy

Yesterday was Jefferson’s 8th birthday.
Happy Birthday!

Just take a look at this cute chubby baby….

Oh my goodness! If I could go back in time, I would go to this exact moment and slobber kisses all over those cheeks again.

Would you believe me if I told you that my love for that little baby has increased with each passing year? At 8 years, I would say that I am almost at a bursting point!

He is an incredible boy and I feel so lucky to have him for a son. He gives the best foot rubs, will do anything for me (he’s been watching his Dad), and says “thank you mom” so often during the day that I actually get annoyed. His heart thinks of others before it's own. He is conscience of recycling and taking care of the environment. He loves nature and all living creatures… whenever there’s a spider in the house, he literally picks it up with his bare hands to bring it outside. My favorite thing about Jefferson though, is his enthusiasm over everything… there isn’t anything you could suggest he do that he wouldn’t enjoy. Some of his favorite things right now are: magic, rocks, sewing, reading, and origami. 

This face isn’t as kissable, but here he is showing off the pillowcase he sewed at his first sewing class….

His birthday was very quiet and slow. I felt sort of bad for the little guy. First of all his birthday fell on his scheduled baptism day, which we will have to reschedule until Dad is around, obviously. Second, this is his “party” year complete with friends and an amazing day of fun…. but alas his mother was too exhausted to pull anything off. And then thirdly, the very day of his birthday he gets the worst case of allergies he has ever had! It was hard to see him blow out his candles, then refuse a piece of cake because he “didn’t feel so well.” I just felt like picking him up, like you do a sad toddler, and just holding him.

But if you ask him, he will tell you that he enjoyed his birthday.
I asked him what he wanted to do. He said he wanted to spend the day at his favorite park, which he’s dubbed, “the best park in the world.” It’s about 45 min. away, but it has everything a kid would love.
Here’s my mom and the kids at the park…

Jefferson with his new rock tumbler. He’s wanted one of these for over a year….

My 8 year old, on his birthday…. trying to muster up a smile, with puffy eyes and a runny nose. Poor guy!

Happy Father’s Day

We want to wish a Happy Father’s Day to one of the best!
Shawn, you are an incredible father and your kids adore you.
Not to mention miss you like CRAZY!!

It’s been difficult to be separated from you. Then the calendar had the audacity to throw in this day to celebrate the 1 person we want here the most!
Luckily, we’re on the 2 week countdown now, hooray.

Here is Shawn decked out in his blues at officer training.

I hope they’re treating you well.
Of course, they can’t give you what you really deserve on this day….

Like your favorite drink, and food….

With a heavy dose of this…

And a bag full of these…

Then a nice nap

A movie of your choice (not like the usual chick-flick you have to sit through)

And an entire day of smothering and pampering from your children (and wife).
Soon enough…

The Circle Game

Yesterday I attended the best Graduation I have EVER been to. It was the 4th graduation for our family in the last 2 months… a little much if you ask me. But to be fair, Jefferson’s ceremony was not a ‘graduation’, instead it was called a “Bridging Ceremony.”
His school is set up by levels instead of grades. When a child advances, they “bridge” to the next level.
It was very symbolic and emotional (I’m trying to see how many times I can use the word ‘emotional’ in 1 month)

Here is a picture (I stole it from online, so the quality is poor) of the entire school, grades 1st through 8th.
Jefferson is on the bottom left… the one getting the bunny ears.

I don’t think I can clearly express how much we loved the Forest Grove Community School! It has become a new family for Jefferson. They foster such a sense of community and acceptance and each student is endeared with love by all of the staff. Jefferson has had an entire year of self-expression and nurturing that has only helped him blossom into a more incredible boy than I could ever take credit for raising. I am so sad that we are leaving this wonderful learning environment, I don’t know whether we’ll find it again. Jefferson is also sad to leave, yesterday was especially hard for him.

It was exciting to have the Bridging in the same building that Shawn had his Hooding Ceremony. It made the event so much more…. yes you guessed it…. “emotional.” 
The school has a bridge that is repainted each year by the 8th grade graduates. Each student leaves their teachers and literally walks over the bridge and into the embrace of the new teachers. But before they are sent over the bridge, they are given a gift… a quality that they have exhibited over the year that they will bring with them to the next level.

Here is Jefferson with his teacher, Ms. Karen.
“Jefferson, the Swallows send you with the gift of Creativity”

Here he is walking over the bridge….

And joining the new class. Of course he’ll be in a new state and not with these teachers for 3rd grade. But it was acknowledged that walking over the bridge is symbolic of going anywhere new.

Then the entire school sang a song called, “The Circle Game.” (you should listen to it if you never have before). Jefferson described the song to us… “it’s about being on a Carousel, with the moving horses you know? And it goes around and around. And you can’t turn back, but you can look back if you want. But you can only move forward. Just like life.”  He explained it perfectly. This is the chorus:
"And the seasons they go 'round and 'round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game”

It’s a truly beautiful song, and so symbolic about growing up.
Which is what Jefferson is doing. He is moving on to a new state and will make new friends.
If this sounds overly dramatic…. trust me, it’s not. I am only expressing things this way because this is how Jefferson is expressing them. All this life change is effecting him hard. I was scared he would burst into tears the entire day yesterday.

Here he is saying goodbye to Karen. See… tears are going to burst any second.

Before heading out to lunch, we stopped by his class garden so he could take it all in one more time. He took his time walking around, picking beans, and showing us some of the things he’s planted….

 

My handsome boy. He insisted on having his picture taken in front of a “monkey puzzle” tree.…Jefferson is going to miss his friend Leo most of all. We tried to capture a picture of them, but Leo had already left, bummer.
Just like the song say…. “we can’t return, we can only look behind.” He has asked me several times if he can visit his school when we come back to Oregon. Of course, I tell him…. but going forward will bring so many more enriching experiences. I keep telling him this whenever he mentions missing friends and his school. I think he may have a dose of his mother in him.
I’m sure he and I will both have to be dragged into the car kicking and screaming… then tied to our seats in order to get us out of here in 2 weeks!

Kindergarten Graduation

Grant has had a wonderful year in school. He LOVES it! It’s a shame that Kindergarten was half day because my entire mornings were spent answering the question, “how much longer til school starts?” Seriously, it was constant questioning. But, he learned to tell time himself as a result, which is good. Although, then the questions became statements of “it’s time for school in_____ hours/minutes”…. constant statements. It’s pretty clear he loved school! It helps when you have one of the sweetest teachers ever.

Grant watched the calendar for days and counted down until his graduation day. We actually went to the Farmer’s Market the same afternoon. We had 3 hours to spare until the ceremony, so why not. Grant was a nervous wreck! He had me check my watch a dozen times to make sure we were okay on time…. which got me thinking…. am I that flaky of a mom that my son doesn’t trust I’ll get him to his own graduation? I hope not. I think I may just have an anal and somewhat OCD son.

Here he is, all smiles….

In fact, he smiled so much, his cheeks started to hurt. He couldn’t take it anymore….

The gymnasium was PACKED with people….  probably 1000, seriously! I thought I was going to pass out from lack of oxygen.
As the kids started walking onto the stadium I got a little emotional (a very common occurrence right now?). Although the entire town was in the gym, I was fixated on the cute boy in the green vest. I’ve decided that I don’t like my kids growing up… in fact, I despise it. And I wanted Shawn to be there with me to watch Grant. And, just as I started to film the event, the video camera died… wonderful!

Here’s a picture of Grant when he finally spotted us in the mob of people…

They sang some adorable songs. I was able to catch  few on my camera.

Then they handed out diplomas to all the kids. They asked the audience to hold their applause until after all of the children’s names were called… my mom clapped for Grant (she is quite the rebel). Here is Grant holding his diploma (backwards)….

Grant with his teacher, Mrs. Bond

Me and my new 1st grader, wow! That ginormous belly is acting as a stand in for Shawn…

I’m still a little shocked that this year is already over and that Grant is a 1st grader. It’s unreal. Where has the time gone?
Grant, you are awesome! You have blossomed and grown so much this year. You have become such a delight to everyone who meets you. It warms my heart when classmates holler ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’ to you… and even more when they run up and hug you. Last year you were solitary and this year you are the highlight to so many others. You will always be the highlight to me! You make every day enjoyable.
I was so happy to celebrate this stepping stone with you. There will be MANY more to come, and I will always be right there, cheering you on!

Happy Graduation Day!

38 Weeks

Well folks, the show is almost over…. hmmm, more like it’s just about to begin. But, the pregnancy part is coming to a close. I know how much you are going to miss my tummy shots. But like I said months ago… I have 1 picture of being pregnant, so I had some serious make up pictures to take.

So, here I am, 38 weeks along.
The following pictures are optical illusions…..

Because that belly looks small to me. And it is, in fact, not! Well, at least not to my back, and hips, and lungs, and feet! It’s only small to the eyes.

14 days until my due date. But who’s counting? Haha, I feel like my entire life is a countdown right now.
My mom comes: 6 days 
Boys out of school: 8 days
Jefferson’s Birthday: 10 days
The baby is due: 14 days
Shawn comes home: 23 days
We move: 25 days
I will be sane: 60 + or – 30 days

Don’t worry, I’m not completely obsessed with checking the calendar on the wall, and on my phone several times a day to recount the dates…. wait, I am. You never know, I may have miscounted. And question….. do you count the ‘current’ day as a day, or not? and do you count the last day as a day, or not? It could make a huge difference if you do ….
I know, totally obsessed!

But I am alone as you know, and my countdowns are all I have to look forward to. My monotonous single-mother life just isn’t cutting it for me. I am missing Shawn like crazy (don’t tell him, it may go to his head… or worse, he’ll use it against me when I’m irritated with him). But I am. I never thought I could miss him so much. Whenever the kids mention him in prayers I get teary. And I cry every time we end a phone conversation or I get a simple text ‘instead’ of a phone conversation. I’ll blame the pregnancy.
I only have 2 more weeks to blame everything on the pregnancy. I need to take full advantage of this while I still can….. like the entire box of Pepperidge Farm entertainment cookies I single handedly ate last night… we’ll blame the pregnancy… and no guilt.

If you were unfortunate enough to talk to me last week (sorry)…. I am feeling better. Shawn left at the worst time ever and I was a wreak. I made 2 trips to the hospital within 3 days. First, I was getting worried because it felt like the lining of my uterus was on fire and was burning through my skin… it was awful. It was an ulcer.
The 2nd time was because I was deathly ill. ‘Deathly’ meaning I thought I was going to die…. which I foolishly told my children, and had all 3 of them in tears (I’m such a good mom). Anyways, I survived whatever virus I had. Several girlfriends came to the rescue in Shawn’s absence. I am so thankful for them. Thank you thank you thank you!!
So, after a week of lying on my couch I’m up and moving again. I’m walking about 2 miles a day in hopes we can meet this baby sooner than later. We’ll see if it helps. I’m getting really excited… we all are. I felt like the entire pregnancy flew by and now the last few weeks are just dragging!
Hurry up baby, we want to squeeze your cute cheeks and kiss your wrinkly skin!